What is it with moronic TV announcers that compels them to generate fake drama? I'm watching PIT @ WAS on Versus (which is probably my first mistake), and to hear them tell it, you'd think only Sidney Crosby and Alexander Ovechkin were on the ice. Sid the Kid versus Alexander the Great! OMG!

Oh, except for when they're pointing out that Evgeni Malkin and Ovechkin were teammates on the Russian Olympic team! But now they have to play against each other! Wow! That has never happened in the history of everything! At every other break in the action, we must put up a table comparing the achievements of these three players!

YES, WE GET IT. THEY ARE YOUNG SUPERSTARS IN THE MAKING.

That doesn't turn a team game into an individual grudge fiesta. At the end of the second period, Pittsburgh scored two goals to bring the score to WAS 4, PIT 3. Bill Clement opens the intermission report with this doofball remark:

"Now after 2 periods, doesn't this set up the kind of 3rd period we were looking for between Alex Ovechkin and Sidney Crosby!" Off camera, one of his co-anchors called out, "whooo!" I'm just surprised no one asked if he could "get an Amen."

In further manufactured drama, during the first intermission, Malkin was interviewed and Ovechkin served as his translator. The first question was about how this was their first "meeting" as NHL players and I had to hit fast-forward to stave off some kind of insta-migraine or something. It's a good game. Stop ruining it with embarrassing and idiotic commentary.

[player mugshots taken from ESPN]